Live, Love, Laugh - makes me wanna gag!

So, I've been told, repeatedly, that I am a glass half empty type of chic. I think know I am simply a realist.  I call it like it is. The two people in the world who know me best, know that I pretty much despise EVERYTHING, and I have a 45 minute rant pocketed for each and every thing I hate.  So today instead of focusing on everything that is wrong with the world... like radiation seeping into the atmosphere, Fox 'news', ignorance and capitalism ;) I have decided to write about the things that make me happy. (Thank you Kati for the suggestion ;) )

I will try to add to this as I think of stuff... 

*My husband's love and devotion 

*Past accomplishments

*Cherry Soda

*Dancing

*Reading stuff that makes me feel smart hehe

*...Feeling smart.

*Visiting my family in Sacramento

*Playing with Roxie (or torturing her lol)

*Driving- I love driving, I used to drive about five hours a day once or twice a week to and from work in LA. Sometimes this was after working for on set for 12-15hrs... and I still loved driving... ( but I hate traffic... ugh see there I go, can't even get through this 'happy' list w/o interjecting a 'hate')  

*I love learning

*Playing with children, rough-housing, racing, I just love getting the opportunity to get muddy and act like a ten year old ... as long as I can shower immediately after hehe.

*Working out

*Doing photo shoots with great photographers for movies or print, if it's in a glamorous location in a metallic bikini or sparkly dress I'm happy lol... If it includes a large paycheck then it REALLY makes me happy lol.

*Getting mail, postcards, note-cards

*Shopping for shoes, clothes, or purses, I have a problem and probably need a 12 step program but I own about 15 pairs of boots alone and over 30 pair of pants, (to prove the point I have bought two pair of jeans this week already) Most of my jeans don't fit me now, I am having an increasingly difficult time finding jeans that are small enough... that topic just leads to one of those rants I spoke of earlier, so... moving on.

*I love getting my hair shampooed at the salon hehe

*I love and miss getting my hair and makeup done all the time in the makeup trailers at work!

*Hiking, and camping, exploring the wilderness...

*I love working with my hands, doing carpentry work gives me a sense of nirvana.

*Painting, I love painting walls and trim, but not ceilings.

*I love designing, pretty much any type of design. From architectural, to graphic, to fashion, and beyond it is my outlet for artistic expression.

*I love tanning in tanning booths (but hate tanning on a beach) haha, haven't done either of those in a while now.. hmmm

*I love my true friends. I don't have as many acquaintances as most modern young females, due to my lack of social butterfly-ness, but I believe I have made more true friends than most. :)

*I get joy out of sending people random gifts (and not random too... probably part of the shopaholic problem mentioned above hehe)

*It makes me happy when I can make someone smile and like me who wanted to hate me from the moment they saw me, this is probably one of the things I derive the most enjoyment from :)

*Skittles and Starburst

*Studying the processes of evolution

*Text conversations with Drew :)

This list got pretty long fast... I guess I do have a lot of things that make me happy in this world!  Which only goes to show, I am not an all around negative person who is incapable of deriving joy from life, just a realist. ;) -I cannot wait to write a blog about what makes me unhappy and on that list will be the kitschy,overused, generic expression, live. laugh. love.  So what makes you happy?

Who's Your Daddy?

I was raised by my grandparents, I will elaborate more on that at a later date.  The reason why that is important to know is that is explains how I could go my whole life never knowing my father.  I was almost five when I was put into foster care, and the last time I remember seeing who I remember as my father was around the age of 3, I know this because I can specifically remember where David (my brother) was, he was strapped into his, I don't know what you call it, those things you put your baby in where you can buckle them in, they can rock back and fourth? Anyways it was one of those, and David was still a baby, meaning I was probably 3. The memory was of my dad and mom fighting, him in his all white cover up (he was/is a painter) David screaming, precariously perched on the to top of a recliner chair and furniture being hurled through the air, I remember begging them to stop, I was scared David would fall if something hit the chair.  The other memory was of him trying to teach me how to drink a beverage out of a glass, while laying down on the couch (this was tricky, I still can't do it without spilling it all over my chest and face lol)

So this blog starting thing happened at exactly the right time because, I found my dad on Facebook!  At first I wasn't sure. But my maiden name is Wiland and there aren't really that many people with that name and spelling in the U.S. so my search was immediately successful and over as soon as it started, the only question was, is this him?  I could only see a few clues, the picture didn't help at all, but I saw a website link.  It was a link to his painting business in San Jose... At this point I knew it had to be him, but I was still unsure of what to do with the information. This all happened almost a year ago now, I chickened out.

Earlier this week I did the search again and more thoroughly, I was able to ask my mom questions to confirm that this was in fact him. (I now have communication with my mother almost on a daily basis, it's something I have come to enjoy and look forward to - more explanation of that budding relationship will be saved for another day) And so I took the next step. I emailed him!  I wrote something short, sweet, and non dramatic, never using words like father or daughter, simply stating who my mother was and that I hoped he had found someone special to spend his life with etc.  

This was followed up by him sending me a friend request.  I was able to then stalk his wife's facebook (because women always have more photos and info on their facebooks then men of that generation!) I was able to see how happy they are together, and it made me HAPPY.  I've always acted so indifferent to parts of my family so it's a little strange to be changing this late in the game, to actually feel happy for him was nice. 

This morning when I woke up my phone was blown up with facebook update notifications, one of which says that my dad has emailed me back!  I have not read it yet and am excited/scared to do so. However I could not fall back asleep after seeing that, so now here I am blogging about it rather than reading it.  lol. 

SO that is where we are currently.  I am excited and will post an update to this. And at some point probably post information that makes the situations around why I was raised by my grandparents more clear, and why this is all such a big deal a little more clear. I just can't seem to really get into details when I know I am sharing this with others and not a singular person, it's weird, I mean I fully intended to lay it all out, but I am definitely holding back, so please don't blame me for this, I'm just not ready. I am so thankful for the friends and supporters I have.  In a personal one on one convo I had with any of you I would be 100% up front about it, but I just can't seem to find the release button to make that happen here.

I will say one of my main motivations for contacting my father, is to find out what other family I have out there, Brother's sister's, cousins, etc.  Things I always wondered growing up, you know?  Well that's it for now, I'll let you know how it goes from here on out!  Thank you so much for listening. xoxoxxoo, from Alaska!

I don't look like Christina Aguilera!

I did a lot of awesome jobs working in the entertainment industry, all of which I am proud to say were legitimate, I made fast and easy money, and kept my dignity - not something a lot of people can lay claim to.

Today I received an email from central casting, apparently they have been trying to get in touch with me but the contact number they have for me is out of commission (I changed my number when I moved to Alaska).  They offered me a two day SAG promo as Christina Aguilera's stand in. 

...This is not the first time.

Back before Burlesque started filming I saw central casting had posted on LA Casting looking for a blonde bombshell, gorgeous, super sexy with a dancers physique, 5'2" and probably something about huge melons... I do not accept stand in work, so I laughed at the irony that Christina Aguilera herself would not pass the high standards they had set forth for her stand in... Anyway... A couple weeks later, I got the first of three calls from central casting telling me the production wanted to interview me to be her stand in for the movie, they emphasized what a BIG DEAL this was... and what a GREAT OPPORTUNITY etc. etc. I was pretty much guaranteed the spot.

...I declined... I was at first offended because I look nothing like her, and I don't find her facially gorgeous (although she is prettier now with some weight on her bones), and her wide hips and piano legs are anything but 'Heather-esque', (or the bombshell they described) it was then I remembered the original casting they had posted and I felt incredibly flattered that in the production's mind I fit their incredibly high standards... I felt even more flattered that I was getting offered the job when I never even submitted for it, but I still wasn't about to embark on the hell that journey would have been!

Anyway, all of this burlesque crap happened the end of 2009/beginning of 2010, but today's email from Adam at central brought back the memory - the horror, and the flattery... and for the record,

I don't look like Christina Aguilera!

So you actually showed up...?

Wow, so you've made it this far... Here is the first of probably what will ultimately be only a handful of blogs, I mean eventually I will figure out I have NOTHING to talk about and you will realize that I AM BAT CHICK CRAZY!  Sooo until then, here it goes!

Welcome to my blog! I use way too many exclamation marks, probably to make up for the mundane nature of what is actually being expressed. I say this to you as a warning. If you don't like punctuation, leave now. Okay moving on. 

Topics just may include the following: Fitness, stock market, evolutionary anthropology, Pole dancing, Sociology, Empiricism, Politics, Alaskan life, Domestic divadom, what makes me, ME, Modeling, Photography, Mental disorders, and why Glenn Beck should fall off the wagon, land on a hypodermic needle and drink himself to death fulfilling his ultimate destiny.

 So now you know what you have to loathe or look forward to, hope to see you for round 2 ;) Oh and please take the fitness poll on the right hand side of the blog. thx.